The first year at school is an important stage in a child's life that can affect their further development and attitude to learning. However, not all parents know how to properly prepare their children for a new stage in life. Psychologist Oksana Gomel in her commentary to UNN shared recommendations that will help make this transition easier and less stressful for the child.
Children usually like going to school because it is something new for them, a stage of growing up. Most are excited about it, of course, there are exceptions. Children who do not have the habit of striving for new knowledge and skills are afraid of school because they do not understand what a "school" is, what they need to do there, and they do not value knowledge
The psychologist noted that the lack of desire to learn often comes from parents who completely shift the responsibility for education to teachers and the school. Children who have not been taught to love learning and discovering new things, who have not seen their parents' examples of how interesting and easy it is, begin to fear school. It is important to teach a child to love learning new things from an early age, and the basis of this process should be the personal example of parents.
"If parents don't read, why is the child forced to read? Even if one of the family members shows the child that reading is interesting, there will be a result, because they will imitate the behavior of an adult. And you should definitely praise the child for this, because you are praising their aspirations," she adds.
The psychologist says that the first-grader will not have a special change in his daily routine, but there will be some changes.
"There is no homework in the first grade, but I would advise teaching a child to spend 1-1.5 hours on any work. For example, drawing. It doesn't matter what it is, but the child should get used to the fact that he or she has to focus on something for a certain period of time," the psychologist says.
If you do this all the time, your child will definitely develop a good habit in a year, and he or she will be prepared for homework in the second grade.
The psychologist also emphasizes that after school, a child should definitely rest, spend time with his or her family and do something he or she likes for about 1-2 hours.
Gomel adds that it is better to encourage a child to go to school using playful methods that can be easily found on the Internet.
"There is no need to put all the responsibility on the school. If parents have not worked with their child before, their child may fall behind their classmates, which will cause additional discomfort. In this case, the child's self-esteem may even fall, and after that he or she will definitely not want to study," she adds.
The psychologist emphasizes that the main task of school is not to learn everything that is taught, but to be able to search for and process information, think critically, set goals and achieve them.
The psychologist also mentions motivation, which is also an important element in achieving success and avoiding failure. It can manifest itself in different ways:
- Children who seek to avoid punishment may often lie, not admit their mistakes to adults, or hide their diaries. They often do not believe in their abilities and do not see the need to succeed. For such children, it is important to create a supportive environment where the possibility of correcting mistakes is emphasized, rather than punished.
- Another category of children strives to achieve high results, doing everything possible to do so. However, an insufficient result can cause them severe stress or fear of failure. With such children, it is important to emphasize the importance of their efforts, to be realistic about their achievements, to analyze what can be improved, and not to raise expectations.
Motivation is fundamental and will influence all the decisions a person will make in life, from whether to choose to escape from difficulties or to achieve their goals.
"Usually, children come to school with a certain motivation already formed, but at this age it can still be corrected, so it is important to work on its proper development," the expert emphasizes.
She says that it is very important to explain and discuss with your child what school means to them, what grade they want to get, and how they will feel when they don't know something.
The psychologist also recommends paying attention to whether the child is afraid to go to school.
The main thing is not to devalue the child's fear and not to say "everything will be fine" because you cannot guarantee it. You should encourage your child that school will be interesting, you will find friends, etc. Find out what exactly scares the child, because the best thing you can do in this case is to address this emotion
The psychologist also suggests that you tell your child your story, how you first came to school, what you felt, what positive moments you had, and what fears you had and how you fought them.
"One way to overcome fear is to draw it. You can sit down to draw your fear and invite your child to draw theirs. When you have drawn them, you can add something funny or cute to them so that this fear does not look so threatening. Let the child "draw" the fear," says the psychologist.
The specialist also advises to communicate regularly with the teacher and correct certain points if there are any recommendations, because children at home and children in another environment are different.
"Always after school, you should ask your child what they studied today, what was easy and what was not, and whether they need help. It is also very important that the child is praised for even the smallest successes. Parents should pay attention to what emotions their child has when they go to school in the morning and what emotions they have when they come home," emphasizes Gomel.
When a child fails at something, it is worth asking: "Do you need help?" This approach not only demonstrates support but also creates a sense of security. Knowing that help is available at any time makes it easier for a child to decide to cope with a task on their own.
She says that it is through such questions that a child learns to reflect and analyze his or her actions and feelings. Parents should understand what guides their child, what decisions they make, and what options they have for solving a particular problem.
During the first month, you should ask the child as much as possible about his or her condition. You should not immediately give advice and try to solve the problem for the child, because the child needs to choose the right path, in his or her opinion. You can also offer options for solving a particular problem, but in no case solve it for them
Recall
The school year 2024/2025 will run from September 2 to June 30.